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Soliloquizing like you would not believe
4:14 am
well that was a clusterfuck if ever I experienced one 
31st-Oct-2011 08:15 pm
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So, just in case there's any confusion about this: I don't get drunk any more. Period.

This is because I am an asshole when I am drunk, and can be fairly abusive to my friends, as well as being an all-around embarrassment. I am aware of that, I'm also aware that it's dangerous, and I have not had more than two drinks together since February of this year. The exception was for my dad's birthday party in July at the Terrapin Brewery, and I regretted the amount I drank even as it happened.

I'll admit that I'm not a perfect human being, and certainly not a perfect friend. I have admitted as much to my bff KJ, even as recently as this past Saturday.

But I don't do those things any more.
Comments 
3rd-Nov-2011 03:40 am (UTC)
It's called being human, for srs. :\ Alcohol is weird, and it makes us do weird things. I think anybody deserving of being your friend should be smart enough to know that. Besides, as you have so pointed out, it's not like you're going out on a regular basis and getting DRUNKFACE all the time. Eight months (or even four or six) is a reasonable amount of time to have between unfortunate shenanigans, no matter what reason or form they take.

(For what it's worth, you've never been an asshole in my book! :3 So there.)
3rd-Nov-2011 07:39 pm (UTC)
I am about to edit the hell out of this post. I've stopped being mad, and I acknowledge she's put up with a lot of my crap over the years.

I came to the realization that I actually just don't like her, which was why I said a whole bunch of terrible stuff to her. Even with that much alcohol (which was ridiculous, btdubs), I still wouldn't have been nearly as nasty and hateful to anyone else in the whole world: just her. It's fairly embarrassing, because I've been annoyed with her for over four years now, and I only just figured out the 'not actually liking her' part. I guess hanging out with her was so habitual that it just never occurred to me, and she's the one I usually get drunk with, so I assumed all drunk behavior = I'm an asshole, when it's really just 'around this certain friend.'

So, yeah, I don't think I'm much of an asshole either, except where she's concerned. Oh well.
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